I am back! It has taken us a long krazy time to finally get internet in this new home! No more tiny internet screens on my phone! Its so exciting! At least I think so! but I am sometimes a little nerdy like that, like last night my excitement to hurry and write in my journal because we bought new pens!!! It was fantastic!
I know I have written about it some on my facebook but a day like Monday needs to be intensely documented somewhere if for no other reason than to remind myself of them on very hard days.
I went to bed sunday night with no real concrete plan for mondays holiday other than maybe try and get the house clean. the kids let us sleep in until 7:57! Even with all that sleep though I dont really remember much about breakfast time other than we had it. while in the peaceful confines of my bathroom I from my phone wrote the FB post " I have a dream that someday my house will be clean! I hope today is that day!" Some cleaning began but I dreaded asking the kids to help or picking the tasks. So I procrastinated that part and cleaned here a little there a little.
I was later taking a break on the couch with my facebook when I saw someone comment that even though it made them chuckle it might have made light of the famous speech. Since that was far from what I meant to do I decided to change it. I searched all Martin Luther King jr. speeches watched some youtubes of them and put up a quote I liked to hopefully redeem myself. And then I gathered the kids around me to watch some of the videos of his speech. Yes I cried a little! I dont know how people couldnt! the way He spoke is so powerful and moving! his emphasis on certain words would give me chills! We had several breaks to explain what he was talking about. Eva would give her input of the things she learned in her class at school. "like if our water fountin wasnt broken, back then if jaron and I wanted to drink water there would have been one for him and one for me not the same one!" All questions were answered everyone seemed to understand the purpose of the day. So they all went outside to play.
Now lately I have had several different discussions on mothers versus dads in the home. One friend and I chuckled that yes if you just wanted your kids to stay alive (for the most part) dads could stay at home (totally joking we know there are some amazing stay at home dads). But its experiences like this one here that make me wonder how my kids would be if our parenting responsibilities were reversed. My husband is outside with the kids for a long time. I look out the window and notice my son has no shoes on. My husband has a winter coat on. When I go outside I say to him "honey its cold out here!" his reply is "its freezing!". I point out the problem and fix them myself after he continues to rake up the leaves. Any who the kids play outside for a while and thats when it hits me. My inspiration! I got out some paper and markers and wrote a chore list for each child. complete with pictures and arrows indicating where the pictures of toys should go etc. I made a list without pictures for my 6 year old and for my husband and myself. I called them in with their red frozen hands and explained what I had done. My 2 year old boy with shining eyes and tongue hanging over the edge of a forming grin looked over my list I had made for him and then said with a shout "yeah!!!"
As the cleaning got under way It was one of those moments when you think "I can do this! I can be a good mother! look at my family! oh wow! this is great We are al working together! And not hurting each other!" but at the same time you are thinking it all very cautiosly because at any moment it could all crash and be over. at any moment I just knew my 4 year old girl was going to fall into her normal, when asked to clean, routine wich starts with lots of " I am tired! my arms hurt! I cant do this!" and ends with a lot of threatening and frustration from me. But it never happened! Everyone loved being able to clean! Instead the four year old was very excited to spray the windex and wash the windows! the 2 year old loved scrubbing the toilet- with permission (and supervision) this time! And the 6 year old (who loved being able to read her own list by the way) had fun pretending she was cinderella while washing the kitchen floor.
We all had fun and were so HAPPY! And what I have always noticed began to happen again. the fruit of something good is always more good! 4 year old knocked over 6 year olds pile of laundry she was folding and I took a deep breath ready for the yells that I would have to silence but instead I heard an "oh! sorry! It was an accident!" and then an "Its ok! I can fix it!" My ready for combat came out in a big whoosh and that whoosh gave way to a "warm fuzzy" inside and that warm fuzzy gave way to a tear of joy! there wasnt a single argument all day!I surprised them with a peice of candy we all enjoyed after reviewing our checked and x'd or crossed off lists. the kids picked out and all agreed on a national geographic documentary about dogs and watched it while josh and I finished up the cleaning. dinner went uneventfully great! There was a wonderful Family home evening lesson on "thou shall not steal" (since the 6 year old is having a hard time learning you cant take things from grammy's house) the four year old chose pancakes for treat. bath and bedtime went smoothly and beautifully!
It was an amazing day! one to remember! Especially since the days following have been difficult and the house is messy again but just like most things if not all things in parenting its not about the house getting clean its about the getting it clean that happened. My favorite young woman leader from my youth gave me a quote "Cleaning the house when the kids are growing is like shovelling snow while it's still snowing." I love it! I know it! but the lessons are not learned in the house being clean the lessons are learned in the getting it there! I know she is right when she said my kids will not remember the mess but they will remember the fun times we had together.
